Match Report: Thirds Vs Middle Park

Sunday 28th July 2013, Webber's Garage, Albert Park
Middle Park 1 - Central Park 1

High viz  wardrobe proves X Factor as Middle Park sneak home.

Words like “character”, “determination” and “triangle” are bandied around far too freely these days. And by these days I don’t specifically mean today. I mean these current times in which we live. These material times. These times in which I am a material girl. Or boy. The celebrity driven, x factor loving, reality-fame driven bubble. Yes, we are inundated with words that no longer have import. They have been hijacked by every Tom, Dick and Harry who is next in line for their 8 minutes of fame:

This is Timmy, a 13 year old singer songwriter from Mallobumby. Mallobumby is a country town with a population of 16. Mallobumby used to have a booming steel industry. But hit tough times during the glam metal years when half the town left to chase the glam dream. Those that stay recall the halcyon days of Miss, the local cross dressing glam rock band dedicated to Kiss who played every Thursday at the local RSL. Some families stayed, including Timmy’s family. Timmy was raised by his grandfather who is 83. Timmy’s grandfather can’t be here because he is coprophobic. Timmy’s parents died after an anaphylactic reaction to face makeup. A large statue of lipstick stands proudly next to a slouch hat digger in memory of Timmy’s parents. Timmy’s whole town is behind him. Except Errol. Errol is angry at Timmy because Timmy wouldn’t put his hands in Errol’s pockets. Giggity. This is Timmy’s chance to shine. His point to prove. His moment…..

No friends that is not character. Character is being the bottom team on the Sunday league ladder and not giving an inch. Battling against the second top team in the league until the 93^rd minute. Character. Drive. Resolve. Central showed plenty of it. Triangle.

And so it was that the Central Park boys turned up to find a highly skilled 15 or so players in yellow high visibility shirts running through game day drills. It was the antithesis of council workers everywhere.

Central Park adopted a traditional 4-4-2, which worked well in the early exchanges. Possession was even with a much of the game being played either side of the halfway line. I guess that’s where it’s normally played. But my point is that both sides struggled to get into any decent attacking position.

Central’s defence stood strong with Rowland and Reuben forming a rock solid partnership. Rowland was strong in the one on ones. Reuben dominated in the tackle, but also looked for a pass each time he won possession - a unique attribute for Sunday league football. The Central lads were able to pass out of defence and backwards in times of danger.  This relieved much of the midfield pressure.

The midfield was strong with good communication from Tim C. Bushranger Tim provided some nice touches and one-twos. The wide men did their jobs, bombing the wings and helping out in defence. Few, if any, genuine opportunities fell to the strikers, but what scraps did come were largely snuffed out by Council.

The yellow team deftly hit a free kick outside the box, which was rudely fended away by a ridiculous full diving stretch save from our keeper. Tim C made it into the box via a jinking run, but only managed to shoot weakly. Central were unable to capitalise from the parried save. Finally, a cross from Alex caught a head and ballooned towards the 30 yd box. Ed, text book like, hit a thunderbolt volley which whistled a couple of centimetres over the bar. It deserved better. Central shut up shop in the last 5 minutes looking to preserve the scoreline into the half time break.

Half time was met with careful optimism. The central park boys looked to stay in the game and eke out a draw or snatch a vital goal. The boys decided to stick to the same plan and avoid a cheap goal, lest all our efforts drain away like sands through the hourglass.

The yellow team came out with a similar resolve in the second half. One sensed their internal dialogue, ‘how the farq are these guys bottom of the table?’ Again few chances presented. And the few chances that did present were squandered. A bit like kars and alex did during my stag weekend in Byron, although Kars was less prolific with his assists. But that’s for another blog.

Standout performers in the second half were Reuben who put in a lung busting box to box performance - some outstanding tackles, followed by the arrogance to pirouette, fade and pick out passes under pressure. Big Ed was all over the pitch winning some crucial first time contests and making some loping but highly efficient runs down the flanks. Young Tom got in on the action and was his usual creative self and loomed large going forward. Alex started finding range with the left boot and pinged in a few solid crosses. Very few mistakes were made and the central boys really did stand up and give it a solid crack. Tim C managed another jink into the box but could not poke the ball on target with a three way contest between himself, defender and goalkeeper.

The yellow team, sensing they may be undone by the central boys, made some wholesale changes and brought on fresh legs to really challenge the tiring central park lads. And so, the changes proved, in hindsight, to be the difference. A fresh faced and fresh legged winger charged down the flank to hit a bouncing ball from 40 yards which floated our keeper. In no way keeps’ fault. One of those ones which, off the boot, has only one destination. The jury is out as to whether it was a shot or a cross, but the outcome was the same. And central were one goal down.

Now Central have been accustomed to cracking in similar situations this season. And from the restart heads were down. Rarely have the central boys played better, yet still trailed by a goal. But the pessimism did not last long and nearly everyone stepped up to take the game by the scruff of the neck. Central have been guilty of looking to others to make the difference in such situations, but there was an individual resolve which resulted in a collective character. Determination. Fortitude. Triangle.

Several goal mouth scrambles ensued, mostly at the yellow end. Central had a couple of chances to draw level had the shooting boots been on. Alas the few chances that presented were snatched or skewed. It was end to end stuff with Central’s shape largely holding and everyone looking to get back and prevent the second goal. Finally, the whistle blew for full time. It was curtains for Sunday. Theatre of the highest quality. Slightly anti-climactic for the central lads, but like a lars von trier film, there was plenty to take away and think about.

BOG – Reuben 

The Rest – Ed, Keeper (everyone else).

Positives – shape, chat and grit. Negatives – lack of that bit of quality in the final third.

Next week – I went to Einstein on the Beach on Friday night. No, not a new hipster bar in Collingwood. It is, in fact, an opera by Philip glass in 4 parts. I heard this song. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m9CuZD69pJ8&list=AL94UKMTqg-9CxrePSXtp13JWORqWx2iJu I could be wrong, but I’m pretty sure they play this to the Barcelona Youth Academy players when they are in their mothers’ womb. It’s literal translation is “offer pass accept offer pass accept offer pass accept offer”. Please ensure that it is going through your mind for 90 minutes on Sunday. If you have the ball, pass it. If you don’t, create an option to receive it. Repeat. Triangle.